<body> BEAUTIFUL MISTAKE

 

...PROFILE

Aini
life has its own regrets.
but i lead it
n i make sure no ones else does.

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ICE ANGEL

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    ...CREDITS

    DESIGNER:  ice angel


     

    Brushes: Fractured-Sanity.Org
    Photos: 1 2 3 4

    Friday, December 22, 2006


    Last two Sundays, I confidently wore my blue baju raya and pierced a sanggul thru my bun and went to Epi's tunang. I don't know wat in the catnation i was thinking but since i was late and couldnt find my chopstick, I absent mindedly thouht that sanggul was the closest substitute(sorry hafiz, im not talking econs) . It didn't take me long to realise what a wrong decision that had been. So before more people begins to see what an idiot I was, I decided that changing was probably the best idea. Luckily, i had brought a spare blouse and a comb. We then went to Vivocity to window shop.

    The week after, we attended Shida and Keecap's tunang. Thank god, for this time, I dressed normal. After the ceremony, a whole big group of Andy's childhood friends who are still close at present, proceeded to Bugis and then Cineleisure. We booked a room and watched Take the Lead.

    By the way, here comes e surprise. After so many years of going home late, I've finally got myself grounded. Not that its an achievement of something but I do wonder if its me or is it just my parents. If they hate or worry about me going home late, they should have grounded me eversince I started to learn what night life is all about. Why now, when I'm already 18 and starting to be stubborn?

    Okay, on the other hand I bought myself a complete set of makeup and a pair of black bra and ermm.. tali G. I've never had black or red undergarments. The only colours I ever see in my wardrobe was beige. Suprising kan? According to some 'heartless' soul (ehem), its very the makcik2. Thanks huh.

    And I have finally bought a shirt I've been wanting to have from F21.

    Maybe I shall go rebonding tomoro. fringe? no fringe? bob? short? God please.. remind them to transfer those juicy moolahs into my bank.

    If pleasing someone I love means a high spendage (does this word even exist. alah, u know wat i mean) of money, then what do I get in return? If it means shutting his/her mouth, then maybe its worth it. If not, I think its time to concentrate on MY own happiness. After all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. My eyes think I'm beautiful, so what's your problem?

    tulah, kadang2 nak jaga hati orang. tapi hati sendiri terluka... susahlah kalau macam ni...

     - I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;

    Sunday, December 17, 2006


    This is so cute. You must watch this.
    =)
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IEKszu26vgc

     - I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;

    Tuesday, December 12, 2006


    Here are all the pictures.
    From the day B sent me to the airport until
    my last day in Indonesia. =)



































     - I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;






















    I can feel my goosebumps now.
    Coz it seems that everyone is tuning on to jiwangz.
    And its been a long time since I last
    shiok sendiri with jiwangz.
    About... 4 years ago gitu?
    Hmm.. the goosebumps wun go away.
    =)

    Its 4.30 A.M now and I still can't sleep.
    There's something bothering me at the back
    of my mind but I can't quite figure out what.
    I hate it when this happens.
    I think its the phletora of things happening
    around me that is making me feel this way.
    So maybe I shall lay out everything properly
    and then decide the reason why i can't catch
    my forty winks.

    The first possible reason may be because
    I still can't figure out how to write a resume.
    And I'm supposed to have it ready by morning.

    The second possible reason may be because I'm
    a bit affected by his problems.
    And especially the fact that I know I can't help him
    coz he really have to go through this hurdle himself.
    My heart goes out to him when he told me his problems.
    And no matter how he tried to hide it,
    I can still see the sadness in his eyes.
    And my deepest concern is that he
    doesnt do what he is not supposed to do.
    If he does, he'll be breaking my heart into pieces.

    The third possible reason must be because of what
    The Ex just smsed me.
    That bast*rd.
    I seriously do not know what is wrong with him.
    And why the hell I used to loved him.
    According to B, The Ex looked like tongkang pecah.
    Why yes, it took me this long to realise.

    The fourth possible reason is the fact that I cannot find
    my econs holiday homework.
    Somebody shoot me.
    For my 11 plus 1 year of schooling, i've always been
    misplacing my homework.
    God bless my close friends.

    The fifth possibility may be due to the fact
    that I have been uncontactable to many.
    Which also means that I have been missing on a lot
    which I hope not.
    I've just re-connected to the world now.
    No thanks to fucking handphone.

    The sixth possible reason must be the
    fact that I have downed 4 red bulls.
    If mom knows this, she'll kill me.
    Oh no, this must be it.
    I cannot sleep coz I'm drunk on red bull.
    Damnlah.

    Anyway, I've searched on recipes on Quiche Lorraine.
    I thought it would be nice to cook something for mine and his family.
    But I've decided that death by diarrhoea or food poisoning
    is not at all glamorous.

     - I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;

    Saturday, December 09, 2006


    If you can't take the heat, don't start the fire.
    If you can't bear responsibility, don't start a relationship.

    These few words are succint enough for everyone to understand.
    Yet how many of you, may I ask, actually understands its meanings?
    Considering my readers are all amongst my age and younger,
    I quite believe only few would understand.
    And even those who does are mainly females.

    I often read about men and males organisms (includes animals)
    having the inability to commit to someone or more
    particularly, their partners.
    And in all questions to be asked, why?
    Frankly, I don't know the answer myself.
    But another question crops up.
    Knowing your handicap of not being able to commit, why, in
    the first place, start a commitment?
    It's as good as making a woman feel lucky and then throw her deep into the
    gallows of sorrow for something which could at first be prevented.


    Men.
    I just don't get it.
    But as always, solutions are often prescribed for such universal problems.
    Of course, women complains that their husbands don't change.
    Even though they are submissive and succumb to every needs of that
    shafty homosapiens. So professors came up with new solutions.
    Don't change your husbands/boyfrens.
    Change YOU.
    Change the way you think.
    Stop being submissive.
    Be in control.
    Don't be clingy.
    Be superior. Not inferior.
    And for your information, this is the new millenium.
    Men is no longer the sole breadwinner.
    Women can bring home the bread too, maybe even much more than that.
    Power, intellect. And more importantly, self esteem.
    Ergo, when divorce problems surface, there will be no more
    reasons for women to stay in a marriage for financial sake
    even though she has to suffer in silence.


    So back to this miniscule problem of mine.
    If cant change him, I'll change me.
    And I have a clear list of things I shall be doing this week
    to show that I'm not submissive, clingy nor inferior.
    So far. So good.


    Except the fact that this uncooperative little heart is starting to miss his presence.
    And like what Von Leibnitz famously said, to love is to place our happiness in another person's happiness. So after much consolation, maybe I should stop being feminist for a while and BE pragmatic for a moment. Maybe I should be happy for him because he's enjoying himself.


    See? I've just wasted some minutes of my life for thinking too much.
    All in all, there's no conclusion.
    And I'm still confused.
    Haiz.....

     - I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;

    Friday, December 08, 2006


    Let me first start this by wishing a happy belated birthfday to Fasihah..
    Wah.. dah besar anak mak..

    And also a Happy 2nd monthsary to B!!

    Okay, so the Indon trip was a disappointment.
    We spent most of the time in the cramped bus and for some reason
    which I don't wish to find out, the owner of the Qodariyah's
    Travel company chose to follow us on the trip with his family.
    Which btw, adds on the the already cramped bus.
    And for some obvious reasons,
    I can't help but imagine spitting on his face
    for his MCP-ness and for 'robbing' our money
    in broad daylite.
    That arse was spending a free holiday for god's sake.

    Ok, now back to the Indon trip.
    There was no Hamka which was another disappointment.
    Coz i wanted so much to know who he really was and
    why they looked up to him so much.

    Other than that, it was okaylah.
    Despite the fact that the Tapaians were being
    irritating and all.
    Haha.

    Shopping was great.
    I bought a lot of things.
    Shoes, bags,clothes and accesories for me.
    A bag for mom and sis.
    and many others.
    And a lot - for him.
    Saper jadi matair aku memang bertuah aku cakap ngan kau..
    Coz i love to manjakan my bf.

    Nadiah kept me sane.
    I turned her insane.
    And for that, I owed her a trip to Swensens.

    And erm.. yah..
    I dun think i wuld wanna bore you with nitty gritties.
    So after the pictures are successfully uploaded,
    I shall post it here.

    Till then..
    Calos manos.
    kutidinglanghang ding hang.
    haahha.

     - I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;