Thursday, March 29, 2007
Kakak, I respect for the fact that you've been nice to me and that you're older than me. But I suggest you listen to both side of the story. Even though my mom and sis has been talking
bad about him, after they met at the hospital, my family have admitted that they are beginning to sayang him. And one more thing. He has been talking bad about my mom, my dad and my sisters. I, Nuraini Kamilah, on the other hand, berani bersumpah demi Allah yang I tak pernah ckp buruk tentang Kakak dan Mama. Reason being I love u guys like my own family. Maybe I tersalah ckp pasal Papa. But that was at the spur of the moment and was because Andy has really really sparked off my anger.
Andy sendiri tahu yang I respect Papa. And for that, I am truly sorry and biar tuhan sahaja yang membalas my perbuatan.
Other than that, its internal relationship problem. By which I dont see why Andy have to settle it this way. We could have settled it together. Not use another person to get over one another. Thats not the way.
On the other hand, since I believe maybe Andy has really love her, then I would salvage my feelings just so that I can see someone I love be happy. I am not a selfish bitch.
The only reason why I posted the previous post was only because I am trying to get over it. Its hard. And I cant stay on sappy like this. That, is the only way I control my emotions before it kills me. That was the method taught by my mom who have adapted it from a Counselling Book.
And Ros if u r reading this, let me explain to u lagi. You can get to know me if u want. But its just not the time yet. I am still at the stage whereby I am trying to accept the fact that he has not only broken up with me, but he has also a new girl. I am not ready to hear anything from u yet. And to make it worst, u lied to me. So okay. Masalah pon dah over and we have make nice. I respect u for understanding my point and for the fact that u were sincere in solving the problem.
And please do not worry abt me trying to win back Andy. Like what I have said, in fact many a times before, if Andy is happy, I will be happy for him. That, is how far I will go for love. For the record, I understand that loving someone do not necessarily mean that I own him. But it means that I shouldnt restrict him to myself for he might have been suffering if he does. And for that girl, I hope you take care of him. Because if Andy is sad, I would be sad too. And Andy, do take care of her too.
And Kakak, I have never meant to hurt u or ur family. If i ever do enunciate that, than I am truly sorry coz like I said, it might have been sparked off by momentary anger. So , Kak Wati, Aini minta maaf sekali lagi. And I wish u all the best for your future. And I hope everything goes on smoothly during your special day.
Please kirim my salam to Farhan, Nana, Firdaus and Moksu. I really miss them. Tell them I said sorry too if I have ever hurt anyone of them. And especially Mama. Please tell Mama, Aini minta maaf kalau Aini pernah buat Mama marah selama ni. Aini betul sayangkan Mama dan Aini harap masalah ini tak bererti bahawa Aini tak dapat berjumpa dengan Mama lagi.
And Andy, I am sorry too if I have been one insensitive girlfriend before. I know my mistakes and I believe u have known yours too. I know you have forgiven me but let me use this space to apologise again.
And Ros, let's just forget what happened and be friends. Its no use arguing about problems which could have been solved properly. I hope you do not take it to heart and please do not assume that Aini is here to take him away from u. One thing for sure, I am not like that. And judging from the way you talk, you seem like a nice girl too. Andy is a good boyfriend, trust me.
As far as I am concern, I have said everything that is needed to be said. And if anyone is unhappy, well, I cannot say anything else. I have already picked myself up and am currently trying to run my life again. But it seems that there are many hurdles that seems to be preventing me from doing so.
To anyone else whom I have hurt, I am sorry.
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I have to make my special thanks to NaD, Aisah and Fz and especially Shallini. I really realy appreciate your presence and your sincere help to pick myself up. I am sorry if I have been moody in school, thus ignoring your presence. I did not do it on purpose, I just needed time for myself. But I promise, for the sake of you my loved ones, I will stop being sappy and start being my normal self again. I miss laughing my ass off with u guys, really. And NaD, yes the feelings mutual. I love you.
In fact, one love lost is not the end of the world. I still have all of you my friends and especially my family, who were ALWAYS there for me. Thank you so much.
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Allahummaftah alaina hikmataka wansyur alaina min haza ini rohmatika ya arhamar rohimin.
Ya allah ya tuhanku, bukakanlah oleh mu atas kami gedung rahmat-Mu. Wahai tuhan yang amat pengasih dari segala yang pengasih.
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Ya allah ya tuhaku, hindar kanlah diriku dari musibah dan gantikanlah dengan yang lebih baik darinya.
AMIN YA RABBALL ALAMIN.
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From this, there shalt be no more nemesis for friends r better than foes.
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I guess this is a beautiful mistake too...# ;
